Understanding “Rational Insanity” in Recovery
Yes, this is the same Legionnaire as last week.
And yes, he is still holding the shield of defects.
My point last week was that defects are useful defenses and are therefore hard to give up. We don’t want to have them removed because they work for us. We keep them because they are reliable, not because we prefer to be bad or of questionable character.
My point this week is to connect the dots of defects and insanity.
I felt a tension between knowing that my defects were harmful to me and my unwillingness to have them removed. I was aware of this tension, and it was part of the story of my coming to the conclusion that I might be slightly insane, but the realization that I would hang on to a bad characteristic had to be insane. Anyone who would hang on to character defects had to be crazy.
It was only when I realized that the defects were like the legionnaire’s shield—they had a practical purpose—that I understood that the insanity was rational. It made sense; there was an explanation.
But the fact remained that I was insane, slightly crazy because I wanted to hold onto character defects. Defects that caused problems, and I realized I was living in insanity. That led me to Step Two, the honest realization that insanity, rational or not, was not good. Only then was I ready to let them go: to be restored to sanity.
Why Character Defects Stick: The “Shield” Metaphor
- Defects as defenses: The shield metaphor frames defects not as moral failings but as protective tactics that have served a purpose.
- Practical, not preferential: People keep defects because they work, not because they prefer being defective.
- Tension creates awareness: Recognizing harm but resisting removal is a key internal conflict in recovery.
Key takeaway: Understanding why a defect exists (its practical purpose) reframes the problem and makes change possible.
Quick Action Steps
- Name one defect/shield you rely on.
- What purpose did it serve, and what problems is it causing now?
- How would my life look without it?
- Say aloud: “Even if this helped me, I am ready to see that it also hurts me.”
- Take one small action this week that contradicts the defect (e.g., ask for help, delay a defensive response, acknowledge a mistake).
FAQ (for the blog post)
Q1: What do you mean by “rational insanity”?
A1: “Rational insanity” describes when a harmful pattern is logically justified because it once helped—making the choice to hold it feel reasonable even though it’s damaging.
Q2: Are character defects always bad?
A2: Not always. In recovery language, defects often started as survival strategies. The problem is when their costs now outweigh benefits.
Q3: How does Step Two fit into this idea?
A3: Step Two encourages honest recognition that our previous mindset may be unhelpful. Once we admit the contradiction, we’re ready to change.
Q4: What practical steps can I take to let go of defects?
A4: Name a defect, list its benefits and harms, state a short affirmation acknowledging harm, and take one small action this week that contradicts the defect.
Q5: Can therapy or books help with this process?
A5: Yes. Therapy helps unpack origins and patterns; recovery and self-help books give frameworks and exercises to practice letting go.
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