If I am not the problem

I heard a share at a recent meeting, “If I am not the problem, then I have no solution.”

That caught our attention; it resonated and felt authentic. We all nodded in agreement.

But our AA friend continued, “The trouble is, that expression is all wrong; the opposite is true. When I first heard someone use that expression at a meeting, I said to myself, that’s a cute phrase, and I think it’s true.

“But then I thought about it. It was cute, but not true.

“There are lots of problems which are not me, for which I have solutions. For example, if I hit a post with my car, I have a bent fender. I am not the problem; the bent fender is the problem. And I have a solution; it is called the repair shop. So, I had a problem that was not me, and I had a solution.

“If I see an injustice, like someone being maliciously attacked, I can respond to solve the problem. Again, a problem that was not me and I have a solution.

“There were lots of problems that were not me, for which I had solutions.

“On the other hand, If I was the problem, frequently I had no solutions.

“Alcohol was a me problem; the problem was in my head. Changing my circumstances could not solve the problem; my job, my wife, and my boss were not the problem. The problem was me, and I did not have a solution; I had to turn to God and the Program for help.

“And there are many other problems that are me problems‚—anger, lust, envy and sloth, to name a few. And for these me problems, I had no solutions; I had to ask for help.

“I realized that the cute expression was exactly wrong. The right expression is, if I am not the problem, then I have a solution. And if I am the problem, I have no solution. I have to ask for help.”

The moral of the story, cute and catchy may not be true.