Sponsorship works, even when the sponsor does nothing.
As a sponsor, I have listened to voicemails like this.
“Andy, damn, got your voice mail. This is one of those times when I need a sponsor. Right now, I am so angry I can hardly speak.
“You would not believe what my wife did this morning. Yes, she did it again, the same problem we discussed. It makes me bloody crazy, which is where I am now, crazy. I knew I had to call you.
“I know what you would probably have said to do a quick inventory, look at my part, and make amends. And usually talk about the importance of forgiveness. So I suppose I will have to forgive her. Next, knowing you, you would chatter about acceptance, accepting that she is that way and there is nothing I can do about it. And you would probably point out that I knew what she was like when I married her.
“Thanks. I knew calling you would be a good idea.
“Call back if you can, but I have it under control now. Have a great day.”
A great example of autonomous sponsorship. And autonomous sponsorship works for women as well.
And a lady shared this at our meeting recently.
She said, “I was complaining to my sponsor that I could not stop gossiping. I knew it was a defect, and I had asked God to remove it many, many times. But whenever gossip starts, I join in.
“I had done it one more time. I was angry with myself again and pleaded with her to advise me on dealing with this defect.
“The day before, a group at the coffee machine was gossiping about one of our office mates; I jumped in without a thought. I told my sponsor that this defect was defeating me. It was like I had no control; I knew the right thing to do, walk away, but I could not; I was compelled to join in.
“Then, my sponsor asked, “was there any hesitation before I jumped in?”
“I replied, ‘no, it was immediate, with no thought whatsoever.’
All she said was, ‘I don’t have any suggestions or advice. I will have to think and pray about this. Let’s sleep on it and talk tomorrow.’
“The next day, the same group started to badmouth the same co-worker at the same coffee machine. I was about to say something. I recalled my sponsor’s question, ‘was there any hesitation?’
“Instead of piling on the gossip, I hesitated. Having hesitated, I sipped my coffee and told the girls I had to get back to work. I called my sponsor to thank her for her non-advice.
“Who knew it was that simple? My sponsor, that’s who. She can give answers without giving answers.”
Two stories remind me that sponsorship works even when it seems you do nothing; in fact, as a sponsor, often, the less said, the better.
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Excellent! In coaching sessions, I try not to give advice, but ask a question that helps the client frame their answer. They almost always come back with an amazing solution!
Have a great day Andy!
I love this one.
Thanks Andy.
I always knew that doing nothing is sometimes the best thing to “do”.
Roxana