You say you have hit bottom; I don’t think so. I hope I am wrong, but I don’t think you have yet reached your bottom. You still think you can fix this problem.
fear
Committee in my Head
A visitor from out of town is always welcome at an AA meeting. Recently a visitor brought a note of serious fun to our meeting.
The topic for discussion at the meeting was “the committee in our head.”
The first shares confirmed that this was not an unusual phenomenon.
When Drinking Had One Speed
“When I arrived at AA. I was screaming down the highway the gas pedal jammed at full throttle. The tachometer was red-lined. RPMs were off the chart. The sound was unbelievable. I was hanging on for dear life.”
Apathy is a defence against fear
Apathy worries every old-timer in the Program. A friend said recently, “resentment may have been the number one offender when the Big Book was written, but apathy and complacency may be the number one offender today.”
Living in Fear
When I am running on self-will, I am entirely reliant on myself with no external power to help me. When I am running in this way, I am frequently in a state of fear.