Based on fact, a story is told of a young New York doctor in the early 1950s.
He was assigned to a psychiatric ward to work with alcoholics. In those days, there were few research materials or scientific studies on alcoholism. The 1950s were in the early days of the realization that an alcoholic could find remission and relief from a seemingly hopeless condition. Serious research started in the latter part of that decade.
When he received his appointment, he decided to read about alcoholism and alcoholics. The young doctor reached out to two older doctors who had experience working with alcoholics, asking if there were any texts he should review to become familiar with the typical characteristics of alcoholics.
Both doctors wrote back saying, “There are no reputable texts describing the typical characteristics of alcoholics, but most in the field agree that a careful reading of basic texts on child psychology, particularly on the ages of two to four years old, will show the personality pathologies that you will face when working with alcoholics. Your basic alcoholic has all the personality traits of a difficult two-year-old.”
The young doctor stayed in the alcoholic field and became an expert in alcoholism and drug addiction, gaining a worldwide reputation.
Years later, close to retirement, he presented a paper to young medical students working with alcoholics. In his lecture, he shared the story of the advice he had received. He stated, “Many years have passed since the advice directing me to difficult children as an analogy for alcoholics. But I can assure you that all the research and writing on alcoholism has not significantly added to that fundamental point. Alcoholics display all the characteristics of a challenging two-year-old.”
I share this story because it is still true today. Recently, I was approached by two parents of an adult son who was struggling with alcohol. They asked me for help. I shared the story of the doctor and his advice.
They were amazed; the husband blurted out, “Oh my God, I see it; I can see it so clearly. He is just like a young child, a 42-year-old child—a two-year-old with a wife and three kids. The scales have fallen from my eyes. I can see clearly now.”
He had experienced the doctor’s story.
We alcoholics are not a complicated problem. We are a childish problem.
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