Kelly L. quoted an AA saying the other day, “AA is a way of life, not something you do.” |
In my story, this is a great truth. But this truth did not materialize for me in one bolt of lightning, it evolved over time. And looking back on my road towards Happy Destiny, there seem to be four phases or stages of “AA becoming my way of life.”
1 |
Phase one was a place to go. When I first came to the rooms, AA was a place to go. It was a place where I went to hear about how to stay stopped drinking. I went there to listen to the experts on staying stopped and keeping stopped. |
2 |
Phase two was the Fellowship. After many visits, I discovered that it was more than a place to go. It was a Fellowship to be enjoyed. I came to look forward to the meetings and seeing the guys again. I enjoyed the conversation and bantering. I came to know them and enjoy their company. It was at this point that my sponsor pointed out that this ought not to be surprising, this was the same crowd that I used to drink with. In my drinking days I would have sought out this same group because they drank as I did, we drank for effect. At that point, I had a great Fellowship, but Program, not so much. |
3 |
Phase three was the Program. After many visits and much time in the rooms, I learned about the Steps. I learned to do the Steps in a meaningful and in-depth manner. To spend time thinking about the Steps. I found the Program of AA. |
4 |
But then it had to become a way of life, Phase four. Phase four was the full and complete execution of Step 12. Practicing the principles of the Program and applying them to all parts of my life. I went beyond an intellectual appreciation of the Steps, and I began using the Steps and living the Program. |
And my mental image of the Program of AA changed. I had hitherto thought of the Steps as tools to pick up when problems arose. At this point, I changed the metaphor I had used to describe the Steps. The Steps were no longer tools to be used. They were now ingredients to be mixed then baked into the cake that was my life. A subtle but significant change in the vision and in my attitude.
Now I can fully appreciate Kelly’s quote – AA has become a way of life, transcending habits, a Fellowship or a place to go.
As I reflect on this growth and change in my attitude and perception of the Program and AA, I can see that these were a series of ‘awakenings’ as promised in Step 12.
If you are on the same journey and AA is a place to go, new sober friends, or a series of habits, you have come a long way. But there are, if you want them enough, increased levels of magic ahead of you. With each step in my journey I have experienced increased happiness, freedom and joy. And at each level, I am convinced it cannot get any better, then it does. Wow. What a great ‘trudge.’ Where are on your trudge the road to Happy Destiny?
Leave a Reply