You say you have hit bottom; I donât think so. I hope I am wrong, but I donât think you have yet reached your bottom. You still think you can fix this problem.
desperation
Newcomer and Retreads
On the4thdimension.ca website, we have many requests for a list of Dr. Bobâs Five Essentials and Two Optionals.
Dr. Bob used the Five Essentials to screen potential AAs; if a newcomer did not commit to the Five Essentials, he would wish them well and end the conversation. He suggested the Two Optionals but demanded the Five Essentials.
Desperation and Importance
âIf it is important, I will find a way; if it is not, I will find an excuse.â This was tabled as a topic for a meeting. As the meeting unfolded, we saw the connection between importance and desperation.
From Fear to Fun
We are very clear in our 12 Step work with newcomers: âcontinue to drink and the choices are slow death, institutionalization, or insanity.â
We rely on fear of drinking to motivate and compel the actions that we know will result in recovery. And for many, it works. They identify with our stories and we can see the fear in their eyes. But until that wonderful mix of fear and desperation is apparent and clear, we often see serial failures and slips.
Finally, we see that fear in their eyes and we know that the confidence in their own ability to âlick the problemâ has slipped away; they have hit a solid bottom. Then recovery starts with a genuine commitment to the steps.